Back to the consultant. A lift there by a kind friend. Patient transport was full. X-ray first. (I asked the technician to colour in any hole he noticed in the x-rays). Then a short wait and in to see the miracle maker.
But it was too much to hope for. The hole was still there. And the technician hadnt't helped me out (no Photoshop in the RIE it seems). My tibia is 'lazy'. And, as it hasn't healed, it will have to be 'encouraged'. This will be done by replacing the current nail (from my ankle to my knee) with a slightly bigger one. When the new nail is pushed through, it results in a kind of bone graft - by pushing tiny fragments of bone through to the hole which then activates healing. In essence the operation aggravates the site and gives it a boot up the proverbial.... We hope.
It may not be successful, in which case we try again, with another nail replacement three months later.
The operation will take two hours and I should only be in hospital overnight, assuming everything goes well. I should take around a week to 'recover' and so I won't be knocked back to the beginning. I have to keep on with the physio and the moon boot stays. I asked not to go back to the orthopedic trauma ward. But there are no guarantees - it all depends where a bed can be found...
The operation is slightly complicated by my free flap (skin graft). My flap is fed by an artery, which may be very close to the screws holding the nail in. To undo the screws near the artery means care is required. If the artery is damaged, my skin graft is at risk. (although it now has other blood supplies). So a letter is being fired off to my plastics consultant to find out where the artery is.
God, I hope he can remember. I hope he wrote it down! The artery can be traced with a doppler if all else fails. And my consultant is a modest genius - he will not get it wrong.
So now its a waiting game for the appointment letter. My case is marked urgent. This means I should only have to wait 4 - 6 weeks. Given that this is operation No. 4. my consultant has said he wont bother with a preoperative clinic appointment. I've been in so many times I practically run the place. And it would only mean more hassles with patient transport.
So to the big question. How do I feel? Strange really. Not as I expected. Not hysterical. Not furious. Not desperate. Not anxious.
Just flat. And tired. Tired of the pain which continues to get worse although at least I know the root cause... Tired of telling the same story. Tired of being upbeat. Tired of thinking I should do valuable things with my time and not doing them. Tired of relying on other people. Tired of being tired....
But its not all doom and gloom. Today my ambulance crew included the fabulous Ali. Ali is a fairly recent recruit - around 18 months into the job. And she's wanted to do this work for years. And she starts with the emergency crews in May. She bounced up the stairs, met me with a cheery smile, told me how much she enjoyed her job and beamed all the way to the hospital and back. So much smiling. So much happiness! I can't remember the last time I met someone so genuinely upbeat. I might have a hole in my tibia, but I get to meet people like Ali.. And not many people get that happy opportunity...
But it was too much to hope for. The hole was still there. And the technician hadnt't helped me out (no Photoshop in the RIE it seems). My tibia is 'lazy'. And, as it hasn't healed, it will have to be 'encouraged'. This will be done by replacing the current nail (from my ankle to my knee) with a slightly bigger one. When the new nail is pushed through, it results in a kind of bone graft - by pushing tiny fragments of bone through to the hole which then activates healing. In essence the operation aggravates the site and gives it a boot up the proverbial.... We hope.
It may not be successful, in which case we try again, with another nail replacement three months later.
The operation will take two hours and I should only be in hospital overnight, assuming everything goes well. I should take around a week to 'recover' and so I won't be knocked back to the beginning. I have to keep on with the physio and the moon boot stays. I asked not to go back to the orthopedic trauma ward. But there are no guarantees - it all depends where a bed can be found...
The operation is slightly complicated by my free flap (skin graft). My flap is fed by an artery, which may be very close to the screws holding the nail in. To undo the screws near the artery means care is required. If the artery is damaged, my skin graft is at risk. (although it now has other blood supplies). So a letter is being fired off to my plastics consultant to find out where the artery is.
God, I hope he can remember. I hope he wrote it down! The artery can be traced with a doppler if all else fails. And my consultant is a modest genius - he will not get it wrong.
So now its a waiting game for the appointment letter. My case is marked urgent. This means I should only have to wait 4 - 6 weeks. Given that this is operation No. 4. my consultant has said he wont bother with a preoperative clinic appointment. I've been in so many times I practically run the place. And it would only mean more hassles with patient transport.
So to the big question. How do I feel? Strange really. Not as I expected. Not hysterical. Not furious. Not desperate. Not anxious.
Just flat. And tired. Tired of the pain which continues to get worse although at least I know the root cause... Tired of telling the same story. Tired of being upbeat. Tired of thinking I should do valuable things with my time and not doing them. Tired of relying on other people. Tired of being tired....
But its not all doom and gloom. Today my ambulance crew included the fabulous Ali. Ali is a fairly recent recruit - around 18 months into the job. And she's wanted to do this work for years. And she starts with the emergency crews in May. She bounced up the stairs, met me with a cheery smile, told me how much she enjoyed her job and beamed all the way to the hospital and back. So much smiling. So much happiness! I can't remember the last time I met someone so genuinely upbeat. I might have a hole in my tibia, but I get to meet people like Ali.. And not many people get that happy opportunity...
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